Adele RANT


*Boy George confirms Adele his bastard Love Child “I swing both ways,” George remarks “And what other person in the UK belts it out as good as I do?”

*Adele “A comfort,” Boy George states, “Especially after that musical disaster with Rosie. I'll never trust a woman that hairy with my career ever again.”

*“Um, Boy George must be off his meds because he is NOT my father,” Adele responds from atop her velvet throne inside her new trophy room, “I'd love to cover Karma Chameleon, though.”

*US Magazine insiders say Adele's got Jennifer Hudson "regretting the whole Weight Watchers thing."

*Adele's ex she sings about hid in her closet the night of the Grammy's and begged her to take him back. She rammed her Grammy(s) up his ass. I don't know what happened after that.

*Adele uses her Grammys for bicep curls during a Jillian Michael's DVD the morning after the Grammys, “Taking over the world, bitches!” she screams at the TV.

*Adele puts banana in tailpipe of Lady Gaga's limo following Grammys

*During Rolling Stone press conference, Adele admits “I never lied about my weight on my driver's license” looking right at Christina Aguilera.

*“In my spare time, I nurse orphans and euthanize(smother) puppies with my large breasts,” claims Adele, “My hero, Aretha Franklin, taught me.”

*“Greatest titty fuck of all time” - All of Adele's ex-boyfriends

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